Bright Lights

This time last night I was sitting with Sparkie in Crystals singing and performing actions along to the Kaiser Chiefs I Predict a Riot. It was a great night, I know it’s hard to believe but it truly was, and I was glad to be out again unlike the last few times I’ve been where I’ve not enjoyed myself as much.

Michelle and I had met Laura and an initially pale looking and subdued Stuart at the beefeater before heading down to Crystals where we met up with Kristy and Gary and bumped into Andy, Sparkie and Michelle’s brother Stephen and his fiancée Ellen. This is why I love Crystals (and oddly why a lot of folk hate it), there are always loads of people you know there.

As I mentioned, I enjoyed myself on this night more than the last few times I had been despite the fact that not a lot was different in terms of company, music or atmosphere. In fact I even had a small migraine for the majority of the night causing my head to pound whenever I stopped talking. Weirdly I never shut up all night; usually I hate to talk in the dancing because you have to shout to be heard, though shout I did, and to such an extent that my voice was broken and rasped by the end of the night. I was animated and carefree, even civil to people I don’t know, and more than one person commented that it was as if I were drunk (which, needless to say, I of course was not). I was a little like I used to be when I went out, though I didn’t dance this night (I probably would have though it never came up), and I think I know what it was.

The only thing, other than Michelle and a good story, is more often than not a quest for knowledge or the validation of knowledge which I believe to be true. At first when we got to Crystals I could feel myself slipping into my familiar surly silent and seated persona, which I adopt in Crystals the majority of the time. As I was gradually working my way into a slouch it occurred to me that something wasn’t quite right with the place. It was brighter than usual, I was sure and so after asking those around the table if they agreed with this assessment of increased visibility and getting mixed opinions I went to seek out more. My first point of call was Sparkie and Andy, who I had found earlier during a trademark wonder round, along with Jason, Big Craigy and others. Again opinions differed as to the brightness of the bar area of Crystals, but Andy in particular was adamant that the lighting was as it always was and ever had been. Needles to say: this meant war.

The first bouncer I asked stood by the doors of the side exit and I did not recognise his face. He said that the lights were sometimes dimmed. The next bouncer said that they were dimmed, the barmaid said they were never dimmed, the DJ and his mate said that they were and would be this same night. So I had the votes, 3 for Yes, 1 No and one undecided. I went back to Andy and re-laid this information to him but he was still adamant that those light would not be dimmed and was backed up by a blond girl he was talking with.

Half past Midnight was the time limit set for the lights to be dimmed and for my firm believe to be validated. As that time came and went and the bulbs still burned brightly I found myself defeated but of course did not really care. It the course of my quest for knowledge I had barley sat down and spoke and laughed with all my friends and those around me and met acquaintances barley thought of or newly acquired. I had no care of appearances or self image or expected behaviour and simply reverted into a person I thought long buried.

As I close this post I find myself wondering if in fact those lights were ever dimmed or whether it was my own point of view in previous visits which made the place seem dull.